Tap anything on the table. Every piece tells you what it is and when it’s yours.
Plates
Bowls and cups
Cutlery
Glasses
Also on the table
Customs
Buon appetito
Among family and friends, someone says “buon appetito” (enjoy your meal) and everyone begins. Classic etiquette frowns on it; at a formal meal, “buon pranzo” or “buona cena” is the polished choice. Source
Raising a glass
Everyday toasts are “salute” or “cin cin” (cheers). Strict etiquette frowns on “cin cin” and on clinking, and toasting with water is said to bring bad luck. Source
No cheese on seafood
Parmigiano isn’t added to pasta with fish or shellfish, like spaghetti alle vongole. The cheese would bury the delicate flavor. Source
Cappuccino is breakfast
Cappuccino is traditionally a morning drink, not ordered after about 11 a.m. The rule has eased, but with or after lunch or dinner, order un caffè, an espresso. Source
Take your time
A Sunday lunch can run for hours. Don’t hurry the courses or ask for the check early; the talk matters as much as the food. Source
Bread, not a dip
Bread comes plain, with no oil or balsamic to dip in. Wiping up the last sauce with a piece (fare la scarpetta) shows you enjoyed it; it’s a casual gesture, best kept for relaxed meals. Source
Plate · Bottom of the stack, center
Dinner plate
The flat plate (piatto piano). It sits under the pasta bowl and waits for the secondo.
- When
- The secondo, the meat or fish course, with its contorno of vegetables alongside.
- How
- Leave the stack alone. Once the pasta bowl is taken away, the main course is served onto this plate.
- Why
- Stacking the plates in course order means the table is set once and simply peeled back as the meal goes on.
Source: Saporie, Galateo: come apparecchiare in modo semplice e impeccabile
Bowl · On top of the dinner plate
Pasta bowl
The deep plate (piatto fondo) for the primo: pasta, risotto or soup.
- When
- The primo, the second course, after the antipasto.
- How
- Eat from it with your fork. It is lifted away after the primo, uncovering the flat plate for the secondo.
- Why
- Stacking the plates in course order means the table is set once and cleared one layer at a time.
Source: Saporie, Galateo: come apparecchiare in modo semplice e impeccabile
Plate · Top of the stack
Antipasto plate
A small plate for the opening course: cured meats, cheese, bruschetta, pickled vegetables.
- When
- The antipasto, the first thing served.
- How
- Take a modest helping. Pasta and a main course are still to come.
- Why
- Antipasti are small starters, meant to open the meal, not fill you up.
Source: Cooking Italy, Italian Dining Etiquette: Eat Like a Local
Linen · Left of the forks
Napkin
Classically left of the forks, though some put it on the right. Onto your lap as you sit.
- When
- From the moment you sit down.
- How
- Dab your lips before you drink so you leave no marks on the glass. Finished: loosely beside your plate.
- Why
- A quick dab keeps oil and sauce off the rim of your glass.
Source: Csaba dalla Zorza, Come apparecchiare (e perché)
Cutlery · Outermost on the left
Antipasto fork
The fork on the outside. It goes first, with the antipasto.
- When
- The antipasto.
- How
- Work from the outside in. It leaves with the antipasto plate.
- Why
- Cutlery is laid in the order of the courses, the first one furthest from the plate.
Source: Accademia Italiana Galateo, 5 cose da sapere sul galateo della tavola
Cutlery · Left, the middle fork
Pasta fork
The fork for the primo. Adults twirl spaghetti with a fork alone.
- When
- The primo.
- How
- Pick up a few strands and twirl them in the bowl into a neat bite. Never cut the pasta.
- Why
- Spaghetti is long on purpose. Cutting it, Italians say, spoils the dish.
Source: Tasting Table, 9 Etiquette Tips For Eating Pasta In Italy
Cutlery · Left, next to the plate
Secondo fork
The fork nearest the plate, for the meat or fish course.
- When
- The secondo and its contorno.
- How
- Finished: lay fork and knife side by side on the plate, handles toward you, straight down or angled to twenty past four.
- Why
- It is the last fork you use, so it sits closest to the plate.
Source: Dress My Table, Posizione delle posate a fine pasto e durante le pause
Cutlery · Right of the plate, blade in
Knife
Right of the plate, blade facing in. It’s for the secondo, not the pasta.
- When
- The secondo, and the antipasto if something needs cutting.
- How
- Pausing: knife and fork on the plate, tips meeting, like an upside-down V. Never back on the cloth.
- Why
- Resting cutlery on the plate, never on the cloth, keeps the table clean and shows you’re still eating.
Source: Accademia Italiana Galateo, 5 cose da sapere sul galateo della tavola
Cutlery · Above the plate, handle left
Dessert fork
Above the plate, handle pointing left. It waits there for the dolce.
- When
- Dessert (il dolce).
- How
- When dessert comes, bring it down to the left. Many homes now bring dessert cutlery with the dessert instead.
- Why
- Keeping it above the plate leaves the sides clear for the courses before it.
Source: Csaba dalla Zorza, Come apparecchiare (e perché)
Cutlery · Above the plate, handle right
Dessert spoon
The only spoon at your place, and it’s for dessert, not for the pasta.
- When
- Dessert: tiramisù, panna cotta, gelato.
- How
- Bring it down to the right when dessert arrives. Handles point to the hand that will pick them up.
- Why
- Dessert cutlery waits above the plate, spoon on top with its handle to the right.
Source: Saporie, Galateo: come apparecchiare in modo semplice e impeccabile
Plate · Top left, above the forks
Bread plate
Top left. At many homes there’s none and the bread sits right on the cloth, same spot.
- When
- Alongside the courses. Bread goes with the food; it isn’t a starter or a snack between courses.
- How
- Break off one bite at a time with your fingers. Don’t cut it or bite into the whole piece.
- Why
- Bread is there to go with the food, not to be eaten on its own.
Source: Elisa Motterle, Galateo della tavola: come si serve e si mangia il pane
Glass · Above the plate, right of center
Water glass
The inner glass, nearer the middle. Water is on the table for the whole meal.
- When
- Throughout.
- How
- If you’re offered a choice, naturale means still and frizzante means sparkling.
- Why
- Water sits on the inside, the wine glass further out.
Source: Saporie, Galateo: come apparecchiare in modo semplice e impeccabile
Glass · Right, above the knife tip
Wine glass
One wine glass, the outer one of the pair. Wine goes with the food.
- When
- With the meal, and for any toast.
- How
- Pour for others before yourself, and fill glasses only about halfway.
- Why
- Half a glass leaves room to swirl and smell the wine.
Source: Mama Florence, Italian Table Etiquette: A Fun Guide to Dos & Don’ts
Other · Brought to the right, at the very end
Espresso cup
Un caffè: a small espresso after dessert. It closes the meal.
- When
- At the very end, after the dolce.
- How
- Order un caffè. Don’t ask for a cappuccino now.
- Why
- Cappuccino is a morning drink; after a meal, a short espresso is the norm.
Source: Cooking Italy, Italian Dining Etiquette: Eat Like a Local